Guess what? Men fake it too!

Sex, mood, foreplay illustartion for Verve. Sexual intimacy is vital in a loving relationship, yet may be difficult to achieve. Products can help, says an expert. Pictures: Steve Lawrence 11/04/05

Sex, mood, foreplay illustartion for Verve. Sexual intimacy is vital in a loving relationship, yet may be difficult to achieve. Products can help, says an expert. Pictures: Steve Lawrence 11/04/05

Published Aug 6, 2012

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London - Recently an online poll at website AskMen.com surveyed 50 000 people on their bedroom antics… with some liberating results for the brotherhood.

Although a third of women said they never needed to fake a climax, a quarter claimed they did every single time they had sex.

But the survey had an added twist.

In what can only be described as breaking new ground, a third of men also admitted to feigning orgasms. Not once or twice, but just as much as their female counterparts. And I’m really pleased they did.

Why? because it might just redistribute a sexual responsibility which men have single-handedly shouldered for far too long.

Finally, after years of programmes like Sex And The City claiming that a man’s duty is a woman’s sexual satisfaction (and never vice versa – after all, that would be sexist), men seem willing to admit that girls don’t always get it right either. Good on them.

After all, in an age of erotic literacy, there’s no excuse for people not pulling their own sexual weight.

The timing of this revelation couldn’t have been better.

Yes, it may have raised a few female eyebrows, but given that so many women are currently reading Fifty Shades Of Grey, the message has arrived right on cue. Mainly because – for most men – the concept of faking it is nothing new. In fact, it’s been one of our best-kept secrets for years.

Scratch beneath the surface and several of my male mates admit that when a sexual situation isn’t working for them as much as their female partner, they politely fake their way out of it.

My response? Fair enough. After all, it’s nothing us men haven’t been listening to forever. And, just like we are, women will also now be on their toes.

Given that there should be little room for complacency or entitlement in the bedroom, this can only be a good thing.

The other bright side is that it directly challenges the myth that men are grateful for any female touch, any time.

According to the wider world, male sexuality is shallow and simple. A message which is dangerous for both genders.

Since the advent of the pill, women have been told that they could – and should – be having orgasms, because men have them at the drop of a hat.

Clearly, from the aforementioned statistics, this isn’t true. Especially when our other sexual organ – the brain – is fed endless messages that we must do better or face humiliation. It’s offensive. It’s also not just our responsibility. It’s a mutual thing.

Now, thanks to this study, women can no longer lie back and assume that any dissatisfaction isn’t mutual. And, according to the tens of thousands of respondents who took part, it is.

Forty percent of men were only “somewhat satisfied” with their sex lives and said there was “room for improvement”, while 22 percent said they had no sex lives at all. That’s sad stuff.

Therefore, in today’s age of over-sharing, perhaps we boys should be speaking up more often to ensure we get what we want, when we want it – just like women are encouraged to.

The sexual revolution certainly kick-started a change in how men and women have sex with each other. Now, thanks to this latest revelation, it might just have come full circle. - Daily Mail

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